Can You Make Bras Out of Copper?
MUSINGS:
Wake up and smelt the copper!
With the most populous countries finally trying to industrialize beyond
the 19th century, the demand for raw materials is on the rise. If you've been paying attention to the news, you know that this has resulted in quite a crime wave of all kinds of metal, new and used, being stolen and sold for scrap.
I just heard about 11 dorks in Burnet County - well, 10 dorks and onedorkette - that over 6 weeks lifted 9000 pounds of miscellaneous crap (miscellaneous scrap, hear it how you want) valued at $10,000.
Wow! 150 Bucks a week! For breaking and entering, heavy lifting, truck driving,working late hours, and I don't know about these anodized-aluminum-brained bums, but a lot of metal thieves are digging up buried cable, pulling installed wiring (sometimes even live wiring!) and cutting copper pipes with the skill and accuracy of guilded apprentices, and meticulously disassembling things like bleachers and street lamps. And they're watching metal prices with better accuracy than accomplished white collar commodity brokers, to maximize their resale value!
If you're gonna work that damn hard, couldn't you just get a real job?Or maybe steal something a little easier to handle?
Then I read about the Victoria's Secret store in Fairfield, Conn. that lost about $10,000 worth of merchandise in 3 thefts over 17 days. All in bras! Sounds to me like them Yankee crooks might be a bit smarter (though I'm not so sure about the store manager.)
In the latest theft, they were stripped of 50 bras valued at $4000. Earlier this month they reported that someone lifted 100 bras, from the ”pink collection,” also valued at $4000, and another theft of “seven to eight drawers full of reversible bras” valued at over $2000. (I thought all underwear was reversible. Mine is.)
Now, I don't know if those prices are wholesale, retail, or the one-for-two special, but, empty or
filled, that's gotta be a lot lighter than 9000 pounds of scrap (and more fun to handle.) Of course those folks in Fairfield need to find out just who's getting into Victoria's Secret drawers. Sounds like a job for a J. Edgar Hoover wannabe to go undercover to get to the bottom of being left topless, and find out just who's getting into Victoria's Secret drawers.
A lot of states are hurrying to combat the scrap theft epidemic with legislation that puts more “ID and report” responsibility on scrap yards than even pawn shops are subject to. For example, in Arizona, for any transaction of $25 or more, dealers will be required to provide accurate descriptions or photographs of the materials, visually verify the seller identity against a valid picture ID, record the name, address, and driver's license number, AND GET FINGERPRINTS!
Just where to fence your booty when your cup runneth over with brassieres is not exactly a snap decision, so if this epidemic in Fairfield keeps up, they're gonna have to step up mall security in asimilar fashion to curb it at the source.
“Excuse me ma'am, do you have a receipt for that bra you're wearing? No? I'll just be confiscating that, then, and I'll need to dust THESE for prints...”
Authorities are pretty sure the garments were stolen for resale, and not to satisfy a fetish.
In an unrelated article in the Billings Outpost, “Sheep Rustling on the Rise in Montana; Witnesses report suspect fled in truck with Connecticut plates...”
----- David Dunn
Wake up and smelt the copper!
With the most populous countries finally trying to industrialize beyond
the 19th century, the demand for raw materials is on the rise. If you've been paying attention to the news, you know that this has resulted in quite a crime wave of all kinds of metal, new and used, being stolen and sold for scrap.
I just heard about 11 dorks in Burnet County - well, 10 dorks and onedorkette - that over 6 weeks lifted 9000 pounds of miscellaneous crap (miscellaneous scrap, hear it how you want) valued at $10,000.
Wow! 150 Bucks a week! For breaking and entering, heavy lifting, truck driving,working late hours, and I don't know about these anodized-aluminum-brained bums, but a lot of metal thieves are digging up buried cable, pulling installed wiring (sometimes even live wiring!) and cutting copper pipes with the skill and accuracy of guilded apprentices, and meticulously disassembling things like bleachers and street lamps. And they're watching metal prices with better accuracy than accomplished white collar commodity brokers, to maximize their resale value!
If you're gonna work that damn hard, couldn't you just get a real job?Or maybe steal something a little easier to handle?
Then I read about the Victoria's Secret store in Fairfield, Conn. that lost about $10,000 worth of merchandise in 3 thefts over 17 days. All in bras! Sounds to me like them Yankee crooks might be a bit smarter (though I'm not so sure about the store manager.)
In the latest theft, they were stripped of 50 bras valued at $4000. Earlier this month they reported that someone lifted 100 bras, from the ”pink collection,” also valued at $4000, and another theft of “seven to eight drawers full of reversible bras” valued at over $2000. (I thought all underwear was reversible. Mine is.)
Now, I don't know if those prices are wholesale, retail, or the one-for-two special, but, empty or
filled, that's gotta be a lot lighter than 9000 pounds of scrap (and more fun to handle.) Of course those folks in Fairfield need to find out just who's getting into Victoria's Secret drawers. Sounds like a job for a J. Edgar Hoover wannabe to go undercover to get to the bottom of being left topless, and find out just who's getting into Victoria's Secret drawers.
A lot of states are hurrying to combat the scrap theft epidemic with legislation that puts more “ID and report” responsibility on scrap yards than even pawn shops are subject to. For example, in Arizona, for any transaction of $25 or more, dealers will be required to provide accurate descriptions or photographs of the materials, visually verify the seller identity against a valid picture ID, record the name, address, and driver's license number, AND GET FINGERPRINTS!
Just where to fence your booty when your cup runneth over with brassieres is not exactly a snap decision, so if this epidemic in Fairfield keeps up, they're gonna have to step up mall security in asimilar fashion to curb it at the source.
“Excuse me ma'am, do you have a receipt for that bra you're wearing? No? I'll just be confiscating that, then, and I'll need to dust THESE for prints...”
Authorities are pretty sure the garments were stolen for resale, and not to satisfy a fetish.
In an unrelated article in the Billings Outpost, “Sheep Rustling on the Rise in Montana; Witnesses report suspect fled in truck with Connecticut plates...”
----- David Dunn
posted by Billy Eli at 9:58 AM
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